Dear Friend,

I'm trying really hard to figure out where this all started. I think it would be easier for me to make a choice if I could just figure everything out. I don't really think that I have much left to live for. My parents are so protective, they keep me away from new people because they think I'm too sensitive or whatever it is they think. Either way, it's preventing me from making friends. For example, one of the people I know from school will call and ask if I can hang out and my family never has anything going on so I'll say probably. But then I ask my mom and she says no. For no reason. Just flat out, won't give me a reason why, no. So then, I have to call my friend back and tell them that I can't go and they ask why and I say my mom won't let me. They normally ask if I'm grounded and I say no, so they don't understand why I can't hang out. Most of them just stop calling or talking to me. The weird thing is, my mom's at work all the time. So I'm home alone in a new town with no friends and just my thoughts. Which are getting worse. I'm barely able to hold myself together now; I can't imagine how quickly I'm going to deteriorate once I go back to school on monday. I know she's trying to protect me, even though I don't know from what, but she's killing me. I'm killing myself. A hell of a lot slower than last time though. I'm so stressed all the time. I either have to eat a ton of food or none. Lately I've been throwing up. I can't sleep. My cutting is getting worse. I'm losing myself. 

I don't think I want to come back.